


Stars and Tired Eyes

by sixfragiledreams



Category: Six - Marlow/Moss
Genre: Aramour angst, F/F, Jane is having a rough time :(, Six the Musical References, Six the musical - Freeform, aramour, six the musical angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-18
Updated: 2021-01-20
Packaged: 2021-03-16 17:14:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,852
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28834710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sixfragiledreams/pseuds/sixfragiledreams
Summary: “If you don’t make mistakes, they will love you.” She told herself,“If you’re perfect, you will not get hurt.” Similar phrases repeated in her brain constantly.Second chap coming soon
Relationships: Catherine of Aragon/Jane Seymour
Kudos: 25





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Tw: Accidental Cuts (Broken Glass), Small (non-graphic) mention of blood.
> 
> Italicized phrases = Jane's thoughts.

Jane stared out the window of her room, blanket loosely wrapped around her shoulders. She sighed gently, before getting up and pulling a hoodie over her. The house was dead silent, it being well past midnight. She heard Cathy typing away at her desk as she walked through the hallway, deciding that she would check on her when she came back inside.

When she finally made it to the garden, she felt calmed by the cold air. The stars were bright, the moon barely even showing itself. Jane was never one to express her own troubles, she would rather sit and console the other queens before even batting an eye at herself. When she felt overwhelmed, she’d clean the house and get things in order. When she was tired, she would make dinner for the other queens before tucking up back to her room for a quick nap and coming back down to clean up the dishes with Catherine. She didn’t mind this, in fact, she found comfort in these menial tasks, but that doesn’t mean she always felt like doing them.

The other women insisted on helping out most of the time. Lina would insist on helping her fold the laundry, Catherine would help put away the dishes, Katherine would help out in the backyard, Anna would go to the supermarket with her and Anne would help her cook meals. Jane greatly appreciated their help, however, it sometimes got too much.

One of the many things that Jane had retained from her past life was the ability to stay down low. To be quiet, to not make silly mistakes, to be as perfect as she could. She wouldn’t ask for stuff that wasn’t essential to her survival. There have been times where Jane had pushed herself to the point of exhaustion, gone back up to her room and lock her door, only to break down alone in the silence and the cold. 

_ “If you don’t make mistakes, they will love you.”  _ She told herself,

_ “If you’re perfect, you will not get hurt.”  _ Similar phrases repeated in her brain constantly.

Unfortunately for Jane, this all came crashing down when she broke a glass while cleaning the dishes. She promptly panicked, grabbing the dustpan and sweeping up as much glass as possible. Lina walked into the room, asking if everything was alright, concern tugging at her features. She saw the broken glass that Jane was putting into the bin, also noticing the blood on her hand, and immediately went to help the panicked queen.

And that’s how she ended up out here, all alone, after everyone had gone to bed. Her hand had a couple bandages covering the relatively long, but shallow cut, soothed by the antiseptic cream. She felt guilty, more than guilty to be exact. Catalina shouldn’t have had to deal with Jane messing up. It was her own fault, if she hadn’t dropped the glass, she wouldn’t have been bothering Lina. The amount of times Jane had apologised to her, about the glass, about cutting her hand, about “making” the older queen help her, had put deep concern in the pits of Catalina’s stomach.

Jane was pulled out of her thoughts when she heard the door reopen, and the light turned on behind her. She turned around, to be met with Lina’s figure approaching her.

“Hey..” Jane said softly, unsure at why the woman was awake,

“If you’re wondering, Cathy is sleeping now,” Lina said, sitting down next to her,

“Oh… Thank you. Why are you awake?” Jane paused, “If you don't mind me me asking,” she added,

“I heard your door open, and then I didn't hear it close, so I assumed you were somewhere downstairs. As for why I'm not sleeping, I woke up at around 1 anyways,” She replied, her voice soft. (The truth was she was awake because she was worried about Jane but she wasn't going to tell the anxious woman that)

“Are you okay?” Lina asked,

She didn’t get a reply. As the clouds shifted to reveal more of the moon, she could see the faint tear stains on her cheeks. She opened her arms, gently pulling Jane in towards her chest. The woman flinched at the sudden touch and tensed up before relaxing into the warm arms.

“Jane, darling, I’m gonna need you to be honest with me. When was the last time you took a break for yourself?” The question was direct, but it was said with a soft tone,

“I..” Jane paused to think, “I don’t remember, sorry..” She trailed off,

“I’m not gonna press you for answers right now as to why you haven’t, or why you’re not feeling well, but are you able to take a break tomo-”

“No” Jane said, her change of tone making Lina tense up slightly,

Before Lina could even open her mouth to ask why Jane gave her the answer she needed,

“When doing these things is the only thing that keeps me from spiraling,  _ to keep me from getting hurt,  _ and to keep things in order, I will happily take that option before I would think about taking a break,”

Catherine inhaled, realising quite quickly what was happening in Jane’s head.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I cannot confirm how coherent this is, I did this instead of sleeping. 
> 
> Tw: Self Harm (Neglecting personal needs)

“Jane…” Lina said,

Jane didn’t respond. Instead she stood up and walked back to her room. She didn’t mean to run off but then again, that’s all she ever did anyways. When she got back into her room, she knew Lina was not too far behind her, so she locked the door. Almost immediately, sobs shook through Jane’s body. She tried to grip onto her bed posts for support but missed them entirely and fell to the floor. Her breaths became shallow, darkness clouding her vision, she heard Lina knocking at the door softly, but she felt too weak to stand. She felt her body give in to the exhaustion and quite quickly, she fell asleep against the footboard.

_ Yelling. She heard the yelling from the end of the hallway. She sighed to herself and continued walking, just like a queen should. She kept her head high, but it didn’t feel convincing. She saw Henry, and kept walking towards him.  _

_ “Jane” He shouted at the top of his lungs, _

_ She knew what she had done wrong. Just as she looked up again, she saw a hand coming towards her face. _

Jane awoke with a startle (and a groan of pain). “ _ Just a nightmare”  _ She said to herself, rubbing a hand against her cheek. She had slept for around 3 hours, looking outside to see the sun just starting to come up past the horizon. She stood up, wincing in pain, she did sleep in the worst position possible. She decided to keep up her façade to the other 4 queens who haven’t seen Jane become a mess, she would pop into the bathroom, have a quick shower and get ready.

**After her shower.**

She quickly applied a small amount of makeup, concealing the dark circles and giving her face some colour, brushed through her hair and made her way downstairs (again). She knew the first queen to wake would be Lina, so she quickly fixed herself some breakfast and made the first pot of coffee for the morning.

Once she had finished eating her breakfast, she took some pain medication, gently rubbing at her back. “ _ Note to self, don’t sleep on the floor sitting against the end of the bed ever again”.  _ Jane looked at the clock, noting it was around 6.30 now and that Catalina would be downstairs any moment now. 

To Jane’s surprise, Lina didn’t say anything about the night before to the other queens or even to Jane. She resumed her quiet but thoughtful position as one of the elder queens in the house, seemingly more reserved than before. In all honesty, Catalina didn’t know what to say. She would always calculate her words so there wasn’t confusion as to what she meant, a skill that she had in both lifetimes. But here she was, speechless, probably out of deep rooted concern for the 3rd youngest queen.

Life carried on as normal, at least in Jane’s eyes. The other queens were worried as ever, slowly seeing the dark circles become more prominent, the glassiness of her eyes, the shaking. “ _ God, when was the last time she slept?”  _ Lina said to herself. She seemed less calculated in her movements. She wouldn’t talk much, she would flinch when someone came near her, she’d have her head in her hands when she wasn’t doing something. Jane was folding in on herself, mentally and physically.

Catalina was the last queen awake one night (this was a rare occurrence). So she decided she would go up to her room and read the book she had settled for a couple days ago until she got tired. However, as she walked past Jane’s room, she heard small whimpers coming through the door. She made out a few words from the whispers (“Stop”, “Please”, “Henry”), and immediately realised she was having a nightmare. She knocked lightly on the door before entering  _ “Just in case Jane was in fact awake”  _ She said to herself.

When she walked in, the mess of the room was somewhat jarring. She made a mental note to clean up some of the dishes and take out her laundry early tomorrow morning. She sat on the end of Jane’s bed, not wanting to startle her.

“Jane..” She said softly, giving her a small shake,

Jane was a light sleeper, so hopefully, it wouldn’t take too many tries.

“Jane,” She said slightly louder, once again shaking her gently. 

With that, Jane’s eyes shot open, glassy, small tears running down her cheeks.

“Lina…” She breathed out,

“It was just a nightmare, darling,” Lina said reassuringly, moving next to the shaking woman and pulling her close.

Catalina held Jane as she sobbed quietly into her shoulder, one of her arms gently stroking her hair, the other around her waist tightly. Her heart sank when the woman in her arms looked up to her. Her eyes were red, swollen, eye bags were protruding from the regular smooth, clear skin Jane had.

“I’m sorry..” Jane said meekly,

“I’m sorry for shutting you all out. For ignoring you…” She paused, taking a deep breath, “I’m sorry, it’s just everything hurts so bad and everything is so dark all of the time and it’s terrifying, Lina. I’m terrified,” She said, genuinely looking scared,

“I’ve got you, baby.. It’s gonna be okay” Lina said, kissing her forehead softly,

Jane relaxed into Lina’s arms,

“Stay..?” Jane asked

“Of course, mi amor” 

Catalina adjusted the covers, laying down properly next to Jane. The woman, usually warm and composed, looked utterly broken, clinging to Lina’s side. She put her arms around her once again, pulling Jane as close as possible. Their breathing slowly synced together as the two relaxed. Lina tried her best to ease off the intrusive thoughts by repeating reassuring phrases while running a hand up and down Jane’s back soothingly.

“Night Lina,” She mumbled against Lina’s chest,

“Goodnight, Jane. Sleep well.”


End file.
